Posted by: Run For Life | 16 December, 2008

I knew it was too good to be true…

The dreadmill and I have been trying to come to an understanding as of late.  Really. I’m trying not to act like it’s full of venom that will kill me and it is…not killing me?  (At least as far as I can tell…but who knows – perhaps the gym has installed time-release venomous treadmills.)

I went to the gym on Saturday and was watching the Kona Ironman on t.v. and just running based on feel.  Well, I was actually feeling pretty fantastic which NEVER happens on the dreadmill so I was in my happy-runner zone and not paying attention to time, speed, cals, etc.  (Since Kona Ironman is pretty frickin’ inspiring I’m sure that had a lot to do with it.)

I was at a medium pace for quite some time, inched up the pace a bit more when the ad breaks ended 😉  and then I decided “why not throw a little burst of intervals in here?”  to which my brain responded high on endorphins: “YES!  You’re running and still feeling like a tub-o-lard because the IM is on.  If they can do this you can handle some intervals.”  Ooohhh brain, when will you learn what a jinx is?

It was going GREAT for the first couple of sets….and then…as Craig Alexander is summoning the last bit of his energy on the run portion and Mr. Ironman Narrator is talking about strength and I’m trying to push myself…my headphone wire gets tangled on the quick release strap of the treadmill.  I didn’t think this was much of a worry because I still had ample slack on my headphones so I just tried to unhook it.  Even though the thing is NOT attached to me the combination my fumbling and attempting to keep pace while untangling the wires pulls the emergency stop out.  BLOODY HELL!  The treadmill stops whirring….and my feet hop onto the side panels.

The guy on the treadmill closest to me starts laughing.  ::sigh::  I was in the zone.  ON A TREADMILL.  Figures.  Of course, my sweaty hands could not seem to put the emergency stop back in place without trying 47594597459 times.  Needless to say, I never got back into the groove although I did finish my run respectably.

I think treadmills and I will just have to settle at the “tolerate each other” level of running exploits.  We were so close….


  1. I dont know how you handle the dreadmill, but I like the name you have given it.

  2. That’s nothing. I was once on a (d/t)readmill when my towel fell off the bar, and I, somehow forgetting that I was on a moving piece of machinery, just sort of stopped to pick it up.

    I lost my balance, fell with a loud thud, bounced once, landed again, then got spat out the back of it and rolled ass-over-teakettle to a stop about three feet later.

    EVERYBODY in the entire gym was staring at me. Incredibly embarrassing, I mean on a level of the nightmare where you’re on a busy street and realize you’re naked.

    Anyway, I picked up my towel, got back on the (d/t)readmill and resumed my workout like nothing special had happened. Which was tough, because I got some big bruises out of that.

    I can count the number of times I’ve run on a (d/t)readmill since then on one hand.

  3. I’ve always felt that treadmills are just all an accident waiting to happen…and you just helped prove my point…Yeah, I have issues with the running rubber band of death…SERIOUS ISSUES…

  4. Well at least you didn’t fall off!

    I wonder sometimes why there isn’t more inspirational stuff in front of the dreadmills. If I owned a gym, I’d be showing Boston or the Olympics on a continuous loop – assuming I could get it.

  5. I know you’re pain. The mill isn’t anyone’s friend. Especially those who know what it’s like to run outside.

  6. Hahaha I love your story! I actually fell off one once…totally embarassing

  7. I hear you…the best you can hope for is to “tolerate” the treadmill. In that relationshio, that’s “love”.

    Happy holidays!

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